264 Comments

They should have lightened the plane by throwing Baerbock out of it.

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"Control tower, did you say "dump the fuel", or "dump the fool?""

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You funny.

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"Pilot, did you offload the fuel like I asked?"

"Ja Kapitän, I hope she can swim"

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"After dumping the required quantity of fuel as per Luftwaffe guidelines we were still exceeding the minimum limit, this was met by discarding approx. 80kg of dead weight after which a safe landing was effected"

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Ricarda Lang would have been better ballast to drop, but oh well, that works, too.

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Thanks for the laugh first thing in the morning. Fabulous.

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They should have given those planes to the Ukraine, like all of the other military equipment. How else will the European nations be stripped bare of defense capabilities?

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🎯

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Just what I was going to comment! Hahahaha!

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Good idea.

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Your name suits you

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Seeing the performance of our German weapons in the Ukraine, and extrapolating from our general decline, I am glad we could keep the stick. At least some technology that will be working in a few years.

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The real question is, can a pointy rock be mounted to the stick? Perhaps a study should be commissioned.

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The comments are very funny today! Thanks!

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as Einstein said, they will need it for WWIV

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Nicely done! Yes, the stick.

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An inanimate carbon rod.

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I tried to find details about "performance of our German weapons in the Ukraine". I'd like more detail if you can point me to it.

I was in US Army in the early 70s stationed in Germany. We had a lot of respect for the Wehrmacht at the time.

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The point is that Germany's weapons were contributed alongside the weapons of other NATO countries, and that they have utterly failed to bring about the loudly proclaimed reversal. On the pretext of imminence of this wonder-weapon reversal, tens of thousands of Ukrainian men have died needlessly. The continuation of the war will also destroy tens of billions of dollars of wealth, which will impoverish much of Europe. Given the failure of NATO's war aims, they're unlikely to give a breakdown of which country had the most weapons destroyed by the Russians before they could be used, or which country contributed the most battle-unworthy items etc.

Zelensky was ready to sign an agreement with Putin in late March 2022, as revealed by Naftali Bennett, then Israeli PM, who was brokering the deal; he also revealed that Zelensky backed out of the agreement on orders from the US. The initial repulsion of the Russian column advancing towards Kiev preceded that, so this is not at issue. In the time since April 2022, what has been gained? Nothing. But an immense amount has been lost for no purpose beyond US geostrategic posturing and arms industry contracts.

You are welcome to your nostalgia for a peaceable posting to a US Army base in Germany in the 1970s. That doesn't mean you should be defending the honor of German weaponry in Ukraine today as if it was a football team you were supporting.

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Sorry. I thought you were stating that the weapons weren't performing up to design standards.

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Nothing in the BW performs at the moment to any standards. The national and international headlines on the unreadiness are loud and clear, for decades. The weapons delivered to the Ukraine had that shine of "made in Germany" like Leopard tanks, but the truth is that Germany collected broken down Leopards from their junk yards where they were waiting to be recycled for spare parts, and made them barely fit for rolling on their own to the front. As the Ukraine has neither an accompanying unit to repair broken down tanks nor repair facilities or spare parts in its borders, a broken down Leopard would have to be returned to at least Poland for repairs. It is barely worth the effort. The Ukraine has no chance winning against Russia who hasn't even mobilized yet besides of a limited call in for reservists. All that combined arms advantage is in the hands of Russia, while Ukraine is incapable of producing artillery shells and is consuming NATO stocks at a much higher rate than NATO can produce them. The problem is that this all was pretty much known a couple of months into the war and since it is impossible to win for the Ukraine, continuing to fight costs countless lives and material damage for nothing.

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The last few years has seen the US Army (other branches as well) in decline..

"In the Army’s most challenging recruiting year since the start of the all-volunteer force, we will only achieve 75% of our fiscal year 22 recruiting goal,” Army Secretary Christine Wormuth said in a statement to The Associated Press. “The Army will maintain its readiness and meet all our national security requirements. If recruiting challenges persist, we will draw on the Guard and Reserve to augment active-duty forces, and may need to trim our force structure.”

They project a 10,00 recruitment miss for 2023.

They lowered the physical standards in 2022 because too many females couldn't pass.

They have also started a Future Soldier Preparatory Course at Fort Jackson, South Carolina, for recruits whose weight or scores on the military entrance exam are not up to standards. The program is seen as such a success Army officials are expanding the Fort Jackson program and bringing the courses to Fort Benning, Georgia.

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Yes, I see that - but the US forces decline from a higher level (and mostly due to corruption in high places and the MIC). The BW was never even close to that levels (intentionally I suppose, there was a couple of historic incidents making Germans less liked generally) and even in the 1980s we had the sayings "the BW's function is to slow down the Russians until a real army arrives" and "the BW can defend 30km of border for about 8 minutes"

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No, apologies from me - I got a bit high and mighty because I thought you were unhappy that someone had impugned the prowess of the Wehrmacht (while overlooking the pointless carnage in Ukraine). But I see now that you were genuinely asking a technical question (which I can't answer).

Thanks, by the way, for being at the ready to block the Fulda Gap during the early 70s (although the RAF was probably a much greater danger than Soviet tanks).

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While I was there we would hear about the Fulda Gap often. I was assigned to the Strategic Communications Command in Kaiserslautern. My unit's standing orders in the event of imminent war with the Soviets was to...

1) destroy all classified information in our office

2) escort the US civilians from the area to Ramstein Air Base and leave after them.

During the RAF (we call them the Baader–Meinhof Gang) reign of terror I was doing guard duty one night. It was cold, boring and been going on for months. I heard a car coming and I could tell it suddenly went full throttle followed by the sound of the tires on the gravel between the road and the fence around the Kaserne. The headlights started to illuminate the fence. My heart rate surged and I was the most frightened I have been before or since. I pulled my M-16 off of my shoulder, chambered a round, and took the safety off. The car slide to a stop right in front of the back gate which I was guarding. If there had been someone on the passenger side I would have shot them for sure. The driver was fumbling around and didn't get out immediately. I thought he must be having having trouble getting his weapon. Then the door opened and he got out and looked over the car's roof, I put my sights right on his face as he turned toward me. In the same split second I recognized him and pointed my weapon in the air. I was amazed I hadn't pulled the trigger.

He was from my unit. His car was running out of gas and he accelerated hoping to get enough momentum to make it over the hill and then coast down to Hochspeyer to get gas. I should have said benzene. But, car did run out and stalled. That's when he decided to jam the brakes on and try to stop at the back gate. It almost cost him his life.

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Thanks, Alan - a great story. You would have been completely justified in shooting, given all the circumstances. I hope your fellow soldier was grateful that you put yourself at greater risk just on the off chance that it wasn't a Baader-Meinhof attack. It's astonishing that he didn't think of the impression he would create by his antics.

Also in the early 70s, the UK government started rounding up hundreds of men in Northern Ireland, who were imprisoned without trial, just because the much smaller number of active IRA gunmen were likely to be among them. This became the perfect recruitment tool for the IRA, and the conflict greatly intensified and dragged on for another quarter century. If the West German government had copied this (with US permission), the resulting turmoil might well have persuaded the Soviets that their time had come.

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I was referring to the Leopards, which a short months ago were seen her in Germany as the "Wunderwaffen" (wonder weapons). They even used the same word as Nazi Propaganda used at the end of WW2. The one weapons which would turn everything around and bring the final victory.

Next thing we see the pictures of the burning Leopards at the side of the road, each a coffin for four poor Ukrainians

https://simplicius76.substack.com/p/offensive-confirmed-afu-strikes-hard

As in the USA, our weapons are over-engineered so they can be over-over-priced. They are good for short, overpowering campaigns against a third world country without air power.

In this war, the Russians not only show that in a land war you need a lot of easily produced weapons, artillery shells above all. But they also show us that for every weapon system they have at least equal product, or very superior.

My pet theory: our chancellor Scholz does not want to deliver weapons, because it shows they are crap, and we will lose our business with arms exports.

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How do you say shadenfreude in German?

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These days it is spelled Competency Crisis.

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Thanks, schadenfreude

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... just amusing myself down here where no one will notice.

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😆🤣

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Damn

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This report is a perfect compilation of hypocrisy and abject stupidity.

It's troubling that these people are allowed to vote and drive cars.

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The leadership is completely filled with the true believers, those that have eaten the blue pills to the point that they believe they are truly making a difference, regardless of what the evidence shows. The end is near, lol.

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I'm not sure. There's a large component of EGO and NARCISSISM.

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Warped personality+spirituality often manifests as Cluster B-Personality Disorder (acc. DSM-V).

Cluster B: Dramatic, emotional or capricious behavior

1 Antisocial personality disorder

2 Borderline personality disorder

3 Histrionic personality disorder

4 Narcissistic personality disorder

It’s a dangerous error to allow these types into political office, where they are able to dictate policy, or to put children into their care – but it’s happening everywhere, due to virtue signaling ¡dj¡ts.

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Which isn't necessarily at odds with true belief as well. They just *also* believe that they are the Only True Saviors Of The Planet.

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The other personality problems associated with leftism tend to be neoteny and Freudian projection though.

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Oh, they definitely run the gamut.

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What’s equally troubling is that the German press is not excoriating her

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I will not hear a single word about CO 2 from "climate activists" until ALL private jet travel is banned --- and that vey much includes the private jets of those incredibly valuable (NOT) like Gates, Soros, Scwab, et al. who have publicly argued that their "contribution" is so useful that it negates their carbon footprint. Hooey! They are the true useless eaters among us. And ALL "politicians" and government bureaucrats must be compelled to travel commercially. Until that happens: They can F Off.

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You won't, and already you don't, hear about CO2.

Surely you have noticed that the bare word "carbon" is almost always used by these folks instead of the more accurate term "carbon dioxide". The cynic in me doubts that this is merely accidental.

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I have heard the words "low carbon" (instead of "low carb(ohydrate)") used in food advertisements lately.

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Probably because it’s becoming widely realised that the atmospheric proportion of CO2 is only 0.04%, near record low levels, and that humans only contribute 5% of that. There have been many periods with higher CO2 levels which have been associated with cooler temps. 0.02% is the threshold to support plant life.

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These zealots in politics constantly chant “Science”, yet not one in ten can explain climate change beyond some vague assertion that CO2 causes something like a “greenhouse effect” in the atmosphere. Ask for elaboration and they have nothing to say. By that level of knowledge, I guess that makes me an expert on auto mechanics because I know where to put in the gasoline nozzle.

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Art said: "By that level of knowledge, I guess that makes me an expert on auto mechanics because I know where to put in the gasoline nozzle."

Ah, good, I've been looking for someone like you, Art. So where _do_ you actually put the gasoline nozzle? My visits to gas stations usually end up in an inferno. Which worries me, because this kind of incident is known to have a very high carbohydrate footprint.

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Climate announcements are about power, nothing else. It serves a purpose, namely to get the hard of thinking out on the streets demanding more action.

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Unfortunately it works. Even some conservative people I know are completely demoralized about the future, straight up parroting Club of Rome talking points. Instinctively interpreting any change in their environment as climate change. However instead of turning this into green zealotry, it ended in a defeatist self-pitying attitude. If I were to assume these ideas have been spread deliberately to further political goals, it was complete genius. Create a new camp of malleable activists on the left, rob everyone else of energy. The populace is in total less happy, but power shifts to the right people so it's good.

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Yep; that’s where I don’t understand how the sheeple can’t see what a con this. All the people consume less food and fuel, so the oligarchs can continue to live like The Emperor of China.

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Flying for me but not for thee.

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It's kind of outrageous these people aren't flying commercial as a matter of course. Shows how deep their commitment to carbon reduction really is.

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Because they are only committed to what will personally benefit themselves.

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Just like every true Commie.

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And God forbid they should rub shoulders with the riffraff who only put them into office and pay their salaries.

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Well, think of the mobs of screaming fans that would surely cluster around them if they set foot on a normal flight.

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Yes; she is returning sticks. Put them in a frickin envelope and pay the postage. What a scam/ junket. Sounds like they are learning wrong lessons from the fully corrupt USA.

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Kim G they should be flapping their arms never mind flying commercial, if they truly believe the planet is in such danger it’s the least they can do.

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That was one of Bernie's endearing qualities.

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As a pilot, I find this absolutely hilarious. However, I think I need to expand your knowledge on a couple of points.

A 23-year-old commercial aircraft is in no way antiquated or impossible to maintain. I suspect the issue is with the mechanics employed by your government and/or the maintenance standards for government-owned aircraft. US cargo companies are using 40-year-old Boeing 767s with no problem.

The Airbus A340 was crap when it was brand new. I believe it holds a record for "Airframe featured most often in episodes of 'Air Disaster.'"

My personal aircraft, a Luscombe 8A, was built two years before the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. I have crossed the Rockies at 14K feet in it, and have plans to fly it from the lower 48 to Alaska. I wouldn't let a Bundeswehr employee touch it without supervision and would do a thorough inspection afterwards.

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thanks for clarifying.

i wrote „ageing“ after reading that this particular A340 was scheduled for retirement from the fleet at the start of next year - i.e., that it’s already at the end of its useful life for this role as far as the luftwaffe is concerned.

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Well, they gotta make sure that 48% tax money is spent right away...

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I came for the article, stayed for the comments, and subscribed to your substack. I found your article so entertaining I literally read it three times.

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All that sustainability they love to drone on about and everything is made to drop to bits these days.

Strange that in years gone by how stuff was just made to last, machines and mechanical stuff were automatically repaired. Clothes were made with better cloth and to withstand even being hand washed, they implemented the changes, they then complain about folk consuming too much.

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I'm not a pilot, but I believe that many DC-3's (designed in the 1930's) are still in regular use today.

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There are none still in scheduled passenger service in the US, but there are over 100 still doing charter and in use overseas! In the 1980s Cape Air was still using them out of Logan; I took one to New Hampshire and back and it was a great ride. The DC3/C47 is one of the defining icons of 20th century human accomplishment.

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My dad was an engineer at Douglas his entire career (1960s-1980s). Glad to hear he did good work :)

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Great perspective, many thanks

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"I will live to see the day when Germany is no longer able to transport its politicians anywhere."

You'll want to make sure that on that day, all your politicians are abroad, perhaps visiting the Australian Aborigines.

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or rather, have to make an emergency landing on an uninhabited island. You do not want the Australian aborigines to be stuck with these masters of intelligence do you? Are there any cannibals lefts somewhere? Just asking.

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Cannibalism isn't a fixed phenomenon and has re-emerged from time to time in many places. When the circumstances are right

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When you’re hungry enough.

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we will send along salt and pepper and the desired spices LOL. And maybe some meds for gastric problems. These are probably hard to digest items

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South America, I believe.

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I think may be there are some left in south east Asia too, may be Indonesian islands.

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You mean they could go for a v e r y extended walk about? Right across the Nullabor Plain would be a good hot dry option. In and out the spinifex. Excellent for those green legs.

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Oh no, please, not that! We have enough troublesome politicians over here in the land down-under as it is!!

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The question is; is the inability of German politicians to travel around the globe a feature or a bug?

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LOL! I was going to post similar!

😁

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You have made my day begin in great hilarity for which I am most grateful.

Yes, the holy mission to return priceless sticks. On an aside, I'm starting to develop a serious allergy to the word and concept "indigenous."

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I don't know, perhaps it could be employed to differentiate indigenous Germans from foreign Germans in Passport only..

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The one usage they avoid as you will have no doubt noticed.

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Indigenous — like so many movements these days, starts out with good intentions and then is inevitably weaponized by opportunists, and then driven off a cliff.

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I think it's just one more meaningless term. I had fun one day looking up the origins of all the now-varied peoples who settled all the many many Pacific island countries.

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There's that, of course. I was thinking of it in the sort of social movement sense rather than the semantic one.

As a classic 60s feminist, I'm appalled at what passes for feminism these days, for example.

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It was the social movement usage that made me start thinking about "who comes from where anyway?"

And funny thing. One of the worst jobs I ever had was working rather briefly for a women's center focused on helping our less fortunate sisters in the rest of the world with all that empowerment etc. etc. etc. Sisterhood, as I discovered, far from being global, is not even in the least local. But I'd committed the original sin of being straight and things went downhill with them from there.

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"a stick" That's comedy gold! 😂🥇

There was a time, not so long ago when people from the tribes who lived in big cities visited the tribes who lived in small huts to trade some useful stuff, like "you give me some fish and I'll give you this cooking pot". We have clearly moved on to a higher form of trade; "I give you these old sticks and you give me political credibility and a warm fuzzy feeling inside."

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You civilians will never grasp the genius of government, which is run by geniuses btw. This is cutting edge environmental activism. You just don’t understand THE SCIENCE! The release of the jet fuel is in fact a carefully planned part of Biden’s new genius environment saving concept to block out the Sun, thus the aerosolized fuel cools the Earth by blocking sunlight and then none of the solar panels we all pay for through subsidies work and, uh... wait what? Never mind.

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"I will live to see the day when Germany is no longer able to transport its politicians anywhere" ... A day devoutly to be hoped for.

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Perhaps we should say "I will live to see the day when Germany is no longer its politicians anywhere". I removed some text and the English is not that good, but it's the thought that counts. :)

Including in Germany itself of course. I will say the same for the UK and the rest of the world.

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Am I getting this right? Two government ladies wanted to go to Australia but they needed each a separate plane?

They don't look _that_ fat to my untrained eye.

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Obviously you are not an "expert". It may not be a physical characteristic, but a mental excess of 'fat' that justified the deployment of two aircraft.

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You mean gravitas can substitute for gravity? :)

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I'd say Ireland beats Germany and Belgium for tax take. Once you're on the higher rate you easily pay over 50% of every extra € due to the social insurance and <<temporary(since 2011)>> USC. God knows what they do with all the money: we don't have great public services, 20% of the population is on a hospital waiting list, we don't have an airforce, a navy and only a tiny army. I believe we throw several billion € a year at NGOs to lecture us though.

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Doesn’t the Irish government use all the confiscated funds to supplement the revenue they lose from all the business tax breaks they hand out? My former employer has had a huge facility in Limerick for decades.

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Depends. Not at the moment, despite the lower tax rate, the corporate tax receipts are very high. So much so that various economic review agencies are warning them not to rely on continuing high corporate tax flows.

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Wot's "USC"?

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Universal Social Charge - ostensibly they rolled together a previous social insurance called the 'Health levy', but in practice it was instituted to soak the population to help fill the bill for saving the banks in the 2010 crash (when Irish taxpayers bailed out the bondholders - French and German banks) and it has never been revoked. It's payable on all income - even savings interest and even by people who otherwise would not pay tax at all.

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DHL wasn't an option? And here I thought Germans were thrifty.

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Or FedEx. After all, it is just a few sticks.

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Or snail mail.

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