In which Vladimir Zelensky and the Euro clowncar travel to Washington to hear the Russian terms of Ukraine's surrender from Donald Trump

In Friday’s summit with U.S. President Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin reportedly made any peace deal contingent upon the Ukrainians ceding the rest of the Donbas to Russia, including the heavy fortifications at Kramatorsk and Sloviansk. Were Ukrainian forces to withdraw from these cities, they would leave the rest of their country effectively undefended. The Russians, in other words, will cease fighting only when Ukraine surrenders.

Trump scheduled yesterday’s White House summit to convey these terms to Ukrainian President Vladimir Zelensky. Terrified that the American president would force an unfavourable peace upon Ukraine, European leaders piled into their neon-green clowncar and headed for Washington as well.